Confident in Love: if a female network flirts with criticism…

I, Jeanne Schullers, 37, married and mother of two, am ashamed to confess: I was a very naughty child. And Love Confident reported to me. Good deed: I shouldn’t have acted like a bad person …

Sex, lying and criticism, it’s really the winning trifecta where this community site focuses on the concept of unity between girls. Described by the editors themselves “a community of women who want to succeed in their love life and support each other in their good and bad times ”, this network is exclusively feminine. At first, the initiative seemed friendly, and the intentions shown by the site’s editors seemed commendable.

But beyond the space of exchange offered by the “confidentes”, the site pursues another purpose, devoting itself to the mission of protecting women. “unscrupulous men often fail to make sure they’re married, that they’re not free, even of scammers … That’s why we created VIGILOVE, the basis of bad boys”.

Meetings, on the Internet like elsewhere, sometimes reserve and unpleasant surprises. So it seems reasonable that you want to protect yourself from scams. As this article from Le Parisien explains, dating sites, which have thrived on the Internet over the past decade, are now offered by Love Confident as a Charter of trust and good manners.

But if the content of this charter is relevant, and careful not to discriminate (there are provisions relating to simple common sense and respect of any individual registered as having no difference of sex), the strategy in communication with Love Confident, which promotes the creation of the Vigilove database, very clearly points the finger at men: “We women, let’s be together, and let’s be together in trouble!” (It’s well known, women never lie on their Meetic profile. Neither on their intention or on their own).

While dating sites present themselves openly as commercial companies whose clearly stated purpose is to offer a paid service to their customers, Love Confident’s approach is even more ambiguous: a specialist in “business 2.0” has decided to change her role as a consultant for the actress. And for that, he uses a recipe whose effectiveness can no longer be proven: find an active community with high purchasing power, find strings that are not too big to have a common thread that is more or less water -holding (“women” biatches “, they love the concept”), then parasitize a system in place (dating sites) and armor everyone with advertising, if possible for the benefit of actor in the system you parasitize. Then, talk, make a buzz, take the sorrel and sell it again before it explodes in your face.

Love Confident, which collects biased testimonies, unites a community of female “victims”, whose testimonies must be biased and subjective. And the blacklist of profiles to be avoided was compiled without verifying the allegations.

By digging a little, we learn that Vigilove is actually a tool of criticism. The methods available to the trustees make it possible to criticize, slander and damage the reputation with impunity. With this database, Love Confident has therefore acquired an incredibly fast private justice system. And what can be passed for a concerted and thoughtful measure of prevention has become an arbitrary trap of disturbing effectiveness. Information, slander, everything is possible, this is the magic of trust. I know it, I do it. Demonstration, supporting evidence.

I’m a Bad Boy at Meetic. And I criticized it on Vigilove.

To verify the operation of the Vigilove database, I need a profile to reject… Since there is no question of damaging an existing profile, so I created one on Meetic: this is how February 1, 2011, at 9am, I became BadBoyduWeb: 1m82, brown with blue eyes, attentive, fond of baseball, art and cinema. Tintal, girls?

Once the profile was created, I logged into my Love Confident (“Gaëlle-Marie”) account, and I quietly criticized my Bad Boy.

The simplicity of the procedure made me cringe. Note that the choice of terms is somewhat elliptical: at Vigilove, we are not arbitrarily criticizing, we are “adding a contact”. And even if the site claims to integrate the new “file” after validation by Love Confident moderators, in practice things are very quick: I almost never click “send” that my file is online. And even if site administrators try to moderate the enthusiasm of advertisers, explained by trusted “The flag is above all intended to protect us from each other and not to list meetings that did not work because it did not match the expectations of one or the other”strange to see how easily my Bad Boy’s web reputation deteriorates.

Some input fields:

And a few seconds later, thanks to a touch of bad faith, a sign of bile and a good dose of unrequited wickedness, I confirmed that the beautiful suit I had fitted for my Bad Boy can be found on the site:

And by clicking the card from this “flag”, as it is called by Love Confident, here is my poor Bad Boy dressed for the winter, ridiculed mercilessly. And localized in Meetic, of course. So consult with anyone you trust. [Au terme de ce «test», j’ai informé Meetic de la création de ce faux profil, et il a été supprimé.]

Note that the Terms of Use of Love Trust explicitly mention the absence of any obligation to verify the site, regarding content added by users: “Loveconfident has no a priori or posteriori obligation to validate the authenticity and conformity of the content offered by its users but may remove any content deemed by this to be a manifest violation of the law on July 29, 1881 [Loi relative à la liberté de la presse, NDLR] and/or intellectual property laws ”.

Meanwhile, on February 3 at 11 a.m., the file for BadBoyduWeb (this ugly scammer, this hot-blooded unbeliever) will still be available for consultation on the Vigilove database.

So this is a great tool offered by Love Confident here: any woman, with complete impunity, will publicly slaughter the profile of a man who is not brave enough, or who has the courage to want to commit adultery while refusing marriage.

Distrust of dating sites

Some skeptical dating sites unwilling to join Love Confident: Meetic, which already has its own charter that includes moral commitment and informing customers of methods of control and moderation, have not seen Love Confident — and the logo that associated with it — a real label given by an independent body. No one checks the compliance of the Love Confident quality charter by its signatories. So consumers find their paths blurred.

Meetic therefore considers that the signing of this charter will represent a change, not an advance, of the many ways the group has implemented to ensure moderation of profiles (5,000 profiles have been blocked or removed). per day from 30,000 photos and ads reviewed daily).

Attractive World, also reserved, determined in a press release available on the internet the reasons for its denial, which at this time centered on the financial aspect: in fact, Love Confident took its revenue from an advertising activity on dating sites. However, a charter must be brought in by an independent third party, who will determine the control methods and the guarantees of compliance with the charter.

And the commercial objectives of the Love Confident project are beyond doubt: the area of ​​expertise of Marie-Christine Crolard, the site’s co-founder, the real commercial growth and the design of the new “products”, called for tenders, as well as viral marketing, among other specialists related to communication around web projects.

So far, only four sites have signed the charter of confidence proposed by Love Confident. Despite the media buzz of the Vigilove campaign, it seems that dating sites are less receptive to the principle of the Charter of Trust and the obvious or tacit motives of Love Confident.

Let’s not deny the reality: no, dating sites don’t just reserve nice surprises. And in fact, you will find dishonest men, lying and rude, like IRL (in real life). But the solution is certainly not to be found in so-called commercial medicines that are equivalent to the public and free of charge.

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