how to recognize the signs?

For a relationship to be healthy, it is important to feel comfortable and safe with their partner. And once the exciting beginning of a new relationship is over, you will feel more and more comfortable with the other, who always wanted to be with your partner. It’s normal that you want the happiness of your other half, though if you can’t be happy without each other or if it is not good, that your life choices are made based on your partner, then it may indicate co-dependency between partners, which is not healthy.

A relationship doesn’t have to be codependent, but people can. If we determine our own worth according to our spouse’s opinion of us, then it is a codependency pattern.

Where does the term codependency come from?

It’s a word that comes from the United States and especially from Alcoholics Anonymous and their support system. Although today the word is used more widely, including in romantic relationships, it was originally used to describe the companions of alcoholics, who tried to treating their addictions and not happy when someone else falls. Codependency is still not recognized as a mental illness today, but it is one toxic behavior that you should watch out for. So even if the solution is not to completely separate oneself from others – we all need a minimum of social interaction -, here are the signs that indicate a relationship is trusting.

What is a codependent relationship?

In a codependent relationship, the codependent person models his or her emotions and reactions to his or her partner. The codependent person will try to “cure” their partner, often through toxic and maladaptive reactions and emotions. Usually the Codependent people have savior syndrome and not knowing how to be objective, trying at all costs to help their partner – then pass it on as love. However, this is also a question from the point of view and social pressure: women are “supposed” to help men without having to prioritize their relationship at all. It’s only normal that you need others in your life and on you want to help the people you love. But if we lose our personality in favor of our partner, of his desires, of his feelings, of his needs; then there we can say a codependent relationship.

What is a codependent person?

Because every relationship is unique, there is no single standard of the codependent person. But usually, certain signals can alert us. First, there are the strengths chance that a person will become codependent if their partner has an addiction anything, to the point of fully wanting to save it, to spend his time on it to try to heal him, at the risk of his own happiness. According to Mental Health America, codependency is a behavior learned so often in childhood that it was then passed down from generation to generation. A person is more likely to be together if one of their parents suffers from addiction and/or the other is dependent.

How to identify someone who is trustworthy?

  • He will feel responsible for the behavior of others, often more than reason.
  • He will always confuse love with compassion, may love the people he has mercy on and saves.
  • Always more and more to help others
  • It hurts when others don’t recognize their efforts
  • Depends on relationships. The codependent person will do everything they can to maintain a relationship and avoid feeling abandoned.
  • Constant need for recognition and approval
  • A sense of guilt when it comes to expressing themselves and hearing their voices
  • A need to restrain others
  • Lack of confidence in self and/or others
  • A fear of abandonment or loneliness
  • Difficulty recognizing emotions
  • Difficulty accepting and adapting to change
  • Difficulty respecting and setting boundaries and intimacy
  • Repeated anger
  • Sometimes he lies/is dishonest
  • He will have difficulty communicating
  • He will have a hard time making decisions

How do I know if I am in a codependent relationship?

For find out if you are codependent or if our partner, you need to know how to ask yourself the right questions. Although the level of codependency can vary from person to person, from “healthy relationships” to “completely toxic behaviors”, one can start by answering a few questions before consulting a professional for on advice. If you know you have more than one of these symptoms, know your partner, or are uncomfortable with your relationship, then you should consult a doctor for a professional diagnosis.

  • Do you avoid speaking your mind so as not to create an argument?
  • Are you always worried about what other people think of you?
  • Have you ever lived with someone with a drug or alcohol problem?
  • Have you ever lived with someone who constantly punched you or humiliated you?
  • Is the opinion of others more important than yours?
  • Do you find it difficult to accept the changes that may occur at home or at work?
  • Do you feel rejected when your spouse hangs out with friends?
  • Do you have doubts about your potential to become who you really are?
  • Do you find it difficult to tell others how you really feel?
  • Have you ever felt unworthy?
  • Do you feel like a complete loser when you make a mistake?
  • Do you find it difficult to receive compliments and gifts?
  • Do you feel embarrassed when your child or spouse makes a mistake?
  • Do you think your loved ones can’t survive without you?
  • Do you always think you want to help, no matter what the location?
  • Do you have trouble communicating with people in authority, such as the police or your employer?
  • Are you struggling to figure out who you are and what you want to do with your life?
  • Do you find it difficult to refuse when you are asked for help?
  • Are you having trouble asking for help?
  • Do you have so many ongoing projects that you can never finish any of them?

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