We already know why some romantic dates work (or don’t)

Lightning at first sight, which creates butterflies in the stomach, blushing or sweating, we already know it, but we still don’t know how to explain it.

If we talk today about the chemistry of love, what happens to our body when we fall in love, it’s because science has been studying the subject for decades. Over the years, many research works have thus evoked a cocktail of so -called “pleasure” hormones, which are involved in the meeting, however, no one has discovered the science of “spark” before. meeting.

But a group of scientists from Boston University (United States) can finally uncover the secret of this alchemy, in a study.its results were published in March 2022, in the journal Scientific reports

Attracted people “synchronize”

The researchers started from the following assumption: people who feel attracted to each other are the victims of what they call “synchrony”. In other words, people who are highly attracted to each other will naturally adapt to the behavior of the other person.

From a psycho-biological point of view, synchrony is defined as the pairing of affective states and biological rhythms, over time for the purpose of social regulation.“, explain the scientists at the start of the study.

According to them, this synchronicity is not just due to bodily movements – although we know the importance of body language in love. In effect, they also speak of “internal harmonization”, which connects the nervous and respiratory systems of the victims.

“Romantic attraction involves adjusting the sympathetic nervous system”

To confirm or refute their hypotheses, the researchers conducted a session on fast dating, with 46 heterosexual couples. All appointments (five minutes) were recorded – to determine any similar bodily movements – while “electrodermal activity” – the skin rash – of each person was tested, to measure the responses to nervous systems. After each meeting, participants rated their peers.

According to the researchers, the more people sync, the better they rate their peers.

“This study shows that successful dating, which results in mutual romantic interest, is characterized by increased electrodermal synchrony and harmonization of behavior. When a man and a woman get along and go on a date, their romantic and sexual interest in each other is also high. This provides evidence that people’s sexual and romantic attraction involves social adaptation of the sympathetic nervous system and motor behaviors, ”the researchers report, in the findings of their study.

“A useful mechanism to attract a romantic partner”

If these conclusions allow us to interpret a little more of the unconscious responses of the person we are interested in, they can also be used to persuade the person in question.

“In addition, the results show that People who better fit their physiology and behavior with their partner during the date are more likely to attract a partner.. This suggests that adapting the physiology and behavior of a partner, during interaction, can enhance romantic bonds ”, the scientists explained.

Our research has shown that behavioral and physiological synchrony can be a useful mechanism of attracting a romantic partner. However, we still don’t know if synchrony increases attraction or if a sense of attraction creates motivation to sync.“However, the study is qualified.

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