This health crisis has left us questioning various topics such as ecology or globalization. But not that the couple was a little upset either. Every couple is different. In fact, there are many stages to go through in a couple’s life. From the stage of belly butterflies, to the strength of a fusion love, going through frustration, all its stages focus on the life of a couple. Psychologist Camille Rochet and author of the book, Love started after 3 years discusses themes of couple development, barriers to overcome and good adoption reflexes. The goal? Helping to breathe new life into couples who have sadly lost it. Basically, there are 4 keys to know to go through the stages of a couple’s life to find a satisfying balance and to get out of it. Here they are!
The fusion phase
Belly butterflies, feelings of fullness, unconditional love… Who hasn’t been there yet? The first few weeks or months of a relationship usually begin with love. We are our ideal partner. For us, it’s the most beautiful, the most beautiful, the most beautiful… I mean, it’s the best! You won’t find anything wrong with it. And for good reason, he loves you completely. However, it was time we still got to know each other. Every day away from him is so painful for you. If you can think of him, there are immediately butterflies in your stomach. “Passion is the first characteristic of the first months of a romantic relationship” explained sexologist Véronique Larrivière in Cosmopolitan. This stage from the beginning of my relationship was also the most inspiring stage from the point of view of sexuality. Sex relationships are often at their peak at this stage. You discover the pleasures of the other and thus take the first steps to explore your intimate side of the two. “Everything is new, everything is pink” added the sexologist. This phase of idealization is similar to “honeymoon”. Because we are convinced in every way that the other is perfect. And equivalent in every way we behave to make us happy. Have fun while you can, because sadly this episode won’t last forever!
Disappointment usually occurs a few months after the relationship begins. Once you get through the honeymoon phase where everything is rosy, everything is perfect. You face the harsh reality, where we realize that our partner is not as perfect as we once thought. You discover things you don’t like about your partner. Some habits that irritate you, even behaviors that irritate you! This stage is the only time you leave your little cloud to reach solid ground. But fear not, this step to go through in normal life is part of the life cycle. In fact, according to the sexologist, “It takes a step to find out who we really are. But it can be a bad experience in a relationship. Especially if one of the partners is still in the reunion stage.” We tell you right away, this step away with no pitfalls. In fact, you will face misunderstandings, arguments, and even a difficult separation. But it is still necessary. However, this period of frustration does not have to be the same as negative. In fact, it can be an opportunity for two couples to communicate better within their relationship. It’s also the time to check your accounts to make sure you want to continue or not the romantic relationship. Dare to express your desires, your needs and even your doubts. This is the key to coping with this adversity.
Commitment is the stage where you mourn the ideal couple to give way to the same rewarding reality. It represents true proof of emotional maturity and true, true love. Thanks to this, the partners are in symbiosis and understand that each other is different. This is the secret of the couple’s longevity which is the fact of not changing his partner, but instead accepting it with his faults (to an extent we give you!). Each on his side will work on himself to solve the couple’s foundations and make the other happy. While giving time to external aspects such as your social, professional and family. The couple is no longer the center of your life like during the honeymoon phase. Love changes, it is no longer as useless and confusing as your beginnings, it strengthens and intensifies. This is confirmed by sexologist Véronique Larrivière: “We take advantage of this state of the art of love to enjoy a certain freedom that is absolutely beneficial for the relationship”. But beware of all the same! This step is certainly pleasing, but can also present dangers. In fact, it’s important not to fall into the habit and continue to pursue laziness with little attention. Like short weekends, trips, romantic dinners, outings for two …
This last step usually happens after only a few years of relationship. It is considered the Holy Grail when it comes to romantic relationships. Because only two partners who have gone through previous stages will get it. In fact, trusting each other in a couple is the middle ground where both partners meet each other’s needs in a balanced and healthy way. But beware, you can’t reach this phrase with the hold of a finger. This is the result of many years of working within the couple on each other’s needs and attacks. Lovers who rely on each other are always examples to those around them that they are happy to be such a good couple. The secret to a couple’s longevity is communication and, of course, mutual effort.
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